why I don't like October

I really don't like October. That may have something to do with the fact that my Grandpa died on October 14, 2006. It doesn't seem like it should be two years already. Most days I'm able to move on with no problems. However, when October hits I'm angry, sad, and hurt all over again. The grief feels like it's crushing me all over again. I hope it's a bit easier this year. I will ask God for guidance and love.